You ever get the feeling that there is something that you need to do?
I got that feeling the other day. Last year, a friend of mine had told me about a guy who had an extremely tragic event in his life. He lost his son AND his wife to a drunk driver travelling on the wrong side of the road. It’s just him and his remaining 2 boys.
They had a benefit for him last summer. I remember thinking, ‘Man, that’s got to be rough’. I donated, of course, hoping that what little I was able to give would help him out.
I didn’t have any idea how tough it was. I realize that this is not a contest, but I only lost my son. He lost his youngest son and his wife. I don’t know what I would do without my wife.
Anyway, that event happened about 18 months ago. I was thinking about him just the other day. I know it is a long road for anybody who has to deal with it, so it still has to be pretty fresh in his memory. I ordered another copy of Kelley Farleys’ book, Grieving Dads: To the Brink and Back. http://www.grievingdads.com/pre-order-book/
I wrote him a letter and sent him a copy of the book. What I have found through my continuous reading and researching is that you need to talk with people who have been there. I wrote in the letter that I was willing to make contact with him if he would like. I think it might help him out. I KNOW it would help me.
I hope that he doesn’t read the letter and think I am trying to get something out of him. I tried to make it very clear that I was available to talk with him and that if he didn’t want any kind of communication, that that would be fine. We each have to deal with our grief in our own way. I completely respect that.
Update: I offered to make contact with him. I guess in my heart I was really wanting to connect with somebody that was around my age and was going through a difficult time. As of now, I haven’t heard from him. And that is fine.