39

Had my 39th birthday just the other day.  I’m another year older, something Mason will never be.

I often think about the things Mason will never have.  While I am confident that he is in a much better place and that these little “milestones of life” really don’t matter all that much to him, I am still sad that he will not experience them.  And I won’t be able to see him experience them…..

  • Graduate High School – Mason HATED school.  It was a battle nearly everyday to get him out of bed and ready for school.  Then when homework time come around, it was even worse.  He always told us he didn’t need school.  I guess he was right.
  • Graduate College – Probably not.  See above.  (although, it would have been forced upon him anyway)
  • Getting Married –
  • Having Kids – By far, my 2 greatest days ever were the days Mason and Isabella were born.  His kids would have been my grandchildren.
  • Just watching him grow into becoming a man – I’d love to be there for him like my father has always been there for me.

Just a few milestones in life.  There are so many more scattered in between those, so many more that will never happen.

I miss you, Mason.  I will always love you, son.

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3 thoughts on “39

  1. Hey Kevin – I think about these milestones all of the time. It makes me crazy that Max won't get any of the things I dreamed for him. I am so sorry Mason won't either. What a beautiful boy he was! I am so sorry for you loss. Truly.

    • I hope that you are still following. It’s been a while and I’ve been in a pretty dark place for the last few weeks / months. I haven’t felt much like writing or even reading anyone elses blogs. I’m starting to come back now, although it seems that I can’t get to yours anymore. Of course, if you prefer not share, I understand. I do enjoy reading your blog, though.

  2. Thank you for the kind words."I am so sorry for you loss. Truly." I wish it weren't so, but that means so much more coming from someone who has been there or is there. Thank you.On a side note, I've spent quite a bit of time reading up on your blog about Max. It's just not fair. Not fair to any of us. I too am so very sorry.I'm glad to hear that Mo is doing well. I pray for y'all (and many others) every night.I have to admit it, though. I am envious of your writing. I just can't seem to get the thoughts from my had to my fingers on the keyboard.

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