Well, we survived Christmas. I’ll admit that we had a good time. Watching Isabella open her gifts was very nice. She was excited as only a small child could be. True excitement with her mouth open and a grin from ear to ear.
But we were still missing Mason. He wasn’t there to help her open the gifts. He wasn’t there to help her play with her new toys. He wasn’t there.
I know that I am a lot more sensitive to what people say now. I don’t know how many times I heard, either directly to me or overhearing someone elses conversation, that how “blessed” we are. Oh yeah, we are blessed.
I hate to combine all this into a post about Christmas, but oh well. This is my therapy and I’m just spilling thoughts out onto my keyboard.
Why couldn’t that piece of shit James Holmes, the Aurora, CO movie theater shooter have been “blessed” with a heart attack at 11 years old?
What about that little coward who shot those defenseless kids and teachers in Newtown, Connecticut? Why wasn’t that little sorry excuse for a human being “blessed” with a heart attack at 11 years old?
I used to think that there was a plan. When it was your time to go, it was just your time. I used to think that we all had a pre-determined plan. I’m calling bullshit on that. I think that our Creator is playing a lot of this by ear. I mean, sure, I still believe that there is a MASTER plan, as in God is working a plan to get from “A” to “B”. But, how we get there is undetermined.
God created all things, right? He created Jared Loughner. He created him and all the things in Jareds life that made him turn out the way he did.
Why? Is there some sort of lesson to learn from that? If there is, it is way beyond me. And if the lesson to be learned is so far beyond everyone to comprehend, it can’t be much of a lesson. If we don’t understand the WHY, I don’t think we can learn anything from it.
I’m still struggling with the WHY. I don’t imagine I’ll ever get past it.