Moved

All done, completely moved out of the house.  All that remains is the closing tomorrow.

It was / is strange.  We are now at a place that Mason has never been.  We’ve got all of his stuff boxed up and in the spare bedroom.  It’s just there.  My wife and I pulled out of that driveway yesterday evening for the last time.  It was there, as I put the truck in gear, that I had one of those “moments”.

Here we are moving on with our lives.  Here we are living in a place that Mason has not lived.  We have left Mason’s home.  How CAN we move on?

I just don’t know.  I’m more angry and bitter now than I have ever been.  I don’t want to be.  I’ve got a son on the way and I’m prepared to be the best father I can be for him.  But all that is on my mind is how we are leaving Mason.  How he left us.  How it’s not getting any better.

Just a bunch of crazy thoughts in my head.  It’s almost like “white noise” from an old tv.  I can pick up on things, but it’s like static.  In my brain.

Hard to describe.  I wish I could put it into words, but it just ain’t happening.

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6 thoughts on “Moved

  1. Kevin – There really are no words that can describe it. Moving forward in life – going new places our sons never went – feels almost like a betrayal. Grace and peace.

    • Wanna know what’s really strange? If he had passed away there, instead of my parents house, I never would have sold it.

      • Some things on this journey do not seem to make sense. What others might see as taboo, I may now see as sacred. Grief truly is a unique path for everyone.

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